My guilt and Realization | Thoughtful Daily Post Monthly Prompt #2

My guilt

We all have done things that we are not proud of. Tell us about a time that you wronged someone else. How did you reconcile the situation? Be sure to include your important takeaways!

When I was 12 years old I did something which I am not proud of. Moreover, I did not ever repeat it. I was young and immature I didn’t know what was right for me to do. So, let’s hop into the story!

I went to school with my mom she used to come 3 times 1st to take me to school and 2nd to bring my tiffin box and 3rd to pick me up from school to home. As you can see my mom never left me alone in my entire life I never went to school without my parents. My mother used to tell me that if anyone disturbs me I must complain to my teacher about it or make a call to her through a teacher.

One day, in short break time waiting for another teacher to join and then one of my classmate who is a girl I don’t remember her name and she suddenly out of nowhere asked me to go with her in washroom she was feeling sick so, she wanted to me to help her. She was not even my friend and never talked with me also she has her bestfriend there but she still asked me I had no clue! Anyways, after that when I came back into my class then the teacher came.

The teacher asked for homework then I saw a letter in my school bag. I didn’t put it out to see what’s in there I waited till the teacher left. When the teacher left I started to read the letter and it was a love letter with my name on it. I was very confused who would write me a letter and I myself used to think that we are kids and we are not supposed to do these kind of things that’s what my parents taught me. They did give me permission I can have my bf when I will turn 18. I used to think of love in a sinner way like at this age this a sin, that’s what I used to think. I was very angry after reading the letter even though he had written really good things for me hehe. I was like “how dare someone can give me love letter!!”. I also found out that girl asked me to help so that he can put that letter in my bag.

After that I asked the girl beside me if she knew who it was. Then she pointed on the opposite side of boys where a guy looked at me when she had pointed her finger. I found out it was him and I was very frustrated and I wanted to get him punished for doing silly things at this age. The girl who sat beside me left from school early because she had fever and not feeling well. So, at first I called him by his name and said that how can he do something like this he doesn’t have any manners also threatened him by saying “I will make sure your parents know about your deeds at school.” I also added that “you come to school to do these things and you have no interest in studying but only to write love letters to girls! Do you know if my moms find out she will not spare you!” He was being denial saying that he didn’t do anything like that which made me go mad like crazy. Afterwards, I complained to the class teacher and later on also to my mom.

Next day, when I came to school late and that guy apologised to me besides that I heard from the other class mates that the teacher had punished him and saw that his hands were red. When I joined the class I had missed the first class. Then the girl sat beside me yesterday she said she wanted to talk with me but after the 2nd class finishes then she will let me know. I was curious and waited for the teacher to leave. She started to tell me that I got the wrong guy it was not him then I asked her you pointed at him and he made an eye contact with me then she told me it was the guy beside him. I was fully in shock and felt guilty.

That guy told me it was not him but I still wronged him without justifying anything throughly. That day my mom did not arrive she had given me my tiffin box in my school bag. So, in tiffin time I called him and he avoided me. I was truly feeling embarrassed and guilty for what I have done. Then I followed him to the canteen there was a crowd he wanted to buy some food so, I told him to wait for me I will get it for him. Then I bought it with the money my mother had given me if in case I feel like eating something else from canteen. He wanted to give me money but I didn’t take it. Then I took my tiffin box and I was having my food beside him and I was apologising to him.

That guy smiled at me and said it’s okay if it was someone else she would do the same thing and it’s natural to react like that. I was surprised at this age he is very smart and his way of talking was charming. I was happy that he had accepted my apology. When I grew mature I understood that falling in love with someone or liking them is not a bad thing. It’s only bad when someone is forcing you for it. Also learnt that I should never insult someone who approaches me. If I am not interested then I should deny with good manners instead of making an issue or a scene create about it.

Love is very pure thing everyone should respect it. No one can control their feelings and anyone can fall in love or like someone at any time at anywhere it’s a natural thing and the most beautiful thing. I am 20years old now and I know how to handle those situations carefully without any hassle. I do still feel guilty for what I did even though if it was him it was not a right thing to do. Also, learnt that I should not judge anything without justification. Something done in anger can never turn into a good result but only a burden as like feeling guilty. I was immature and I did it without thinking.

THANKS FOR READING💖

About the Author

My name is Haya, I am from Bangladesh, currently I am a student and I started my journey as a content creator in 2019 , Mainly I am interested in gaming, I am a professional Esports player of PUBG MOBILE. I am known as the most famous female player from PUBG MOBILE Bangladesh gaming community. Mask is my identity I do not intend to reveal my face in future that’s why you will see me in mask in every pictures. I have taken interested in HIVE because it’s the best platform for a content creator like me. I also like travelling, photography, drawing, gardening, blogging and many more things I intend to attempt in my free times.

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