Women Empowerment | Sharing Finances with SPOUSE | LOH CONTEST #145

Women in society

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Since childhood I have been told to study hard. I never liked studying at all. My mother has always inspired me for studying and strict for it. Let’s talk about Asian because I am from Bangladesh , my mother had an early marriage at the age of 14 and she told me that back in time women got into early marriage due to the lack of their respect in the society. It was a burden to have a girl child. Society wanted to get a girl married early because they think that a girl is good for nothing but only a burden.

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For society “Women belongs to the kitchen that’s the only thing women is good at” Because of that parents always had the though that girls can not provide financial support to the family. Parents thought “what’s the use of making her study because in the end she’s gonna become a house wife and it’s a waste of money and time”. Some women completed their study but was not allowed for employment and some women could not complete their study, let’s just say about my mother she is uneducated and fully aware of the disadvantages of it. She is not financially independent and can’t bear her own cost. She can’t help during the financial issues in the family. She always has the regret for not completing her education. That’s why she always wanted me to study hard so, that I can stand on my own without anyone’s help.

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Women also tended to stay in abusive relationship and they won’t leave the toxic marriage due to the lack of financial support you can say without back bone. But now everything has drastically changed in this new generation. Now days women are educated and they are financially stable to carry themselves. I’m 20 years old now and I am financially stable I can do my own stuff , all thanks to my mother if she was not there I don’t think it was ever gonna be possible for me to reach here and become what I am today. Also one of my friend Rose , Back then I was 12 years old, Rose was not allowed to play and always her father made her busy for cooking, her father never allowed her to study but her mother always has supported her. Last year in 2022 her father lost his job but she was able to cover up the financial issues because she has a job. The thing which is saddening is that her father still won’t praise her for it because he is very egoistic person another reason is that she was completing her study and didn’t want to get married. Her going against her fathers decision made a bitter relationship between them. But at last she is independent and now she can achieve everything she wanted.

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Discussing Finances with spouse

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Obviously they should discuss about the finances with their parter. Relationship is all about trust , if a women can’t trust her partner or can’t relay on her partner then he is not the right one for her. “Sharing about how much she earns and that might end up in a negative way” keeping this thought is also not healthy thing. If a women always have to fear with the thoughts of her partner won’t accept in a positive way then why she should stay with him? Having those insecurities can bring up many problems. If she can’t share with her partner then whom she should discuss with? She married someone for life time and he can’t accept her success? What kind of husband is that? If her husband feels embarrassed for earning less then it’s his own problem it’s not her problem to solve it’s his narrow mentality. I don’t think a financially stabled women should stay in this kind of relationships.

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After sharing if her finances details to her husband then if he has the thought that he lost control over her , then I want to stay he never had the control of her or someone else . Just because he married her it doesn’t mean he can control her. Any gender it doesn’t matter you can’t control someone else unless it’s a child. Only a child can be controlled by their parents. But a grown up man/women can’t be controlled by someone. Those who want to have a control are narcissist. These are the most toxic people and we should never allow this type of toxicity. The man carrying ego for his own wife’s success is not a healthy thing and should not be normalised. A women can earn more money then her husband after all the money is going to be used for the family or herself and there is no harm in that. With financial stability women can live separately by their own instead of being in an abusive marriage.

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Even in some cases I saw the man starts to depend on the women and asks money for every single thing . I see nothing wrong in here if the wife has no problem in that because if a man can provide his wife all of his money without any expectation then why can’t a women run a family like that? Man and women has the equal rights. It depends on the person if she/he wants to carry their partners costs or not and if a women doesn’t have the will then she should have a discussion with her spouse instead of hiding about her finances. One lie can bring up another lie and it can destroy a relationship. Egoistic personality can kill happiness. If a women is earning it works like a backbone in the matter of hard times. Situation can change at any time and in this situation a wife can stand by side if she has a earning source. Man and women both should equally give financial support to the family it doesn’t matter who earns the most it’s about to keep the stability of happiness in the family.

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Having a spouse means love , care & respect , if a women always fear of her spouses reaction then it’s not healthy to stay in that kind of marriage. Women should be independent and let her thoughts out with freedom without any hesitation. Husband is not supposed to get jealous over his wife’s any success. Women empowerment is important and no matter what women should never let their guards down for someone no matter what. Women should always look forward with their heads up and fear none. Women empowerment leads a women to be self-reliant, development of the confidence within women within their capacities. In today’s generation women have their power to control over their own lives.

At last I want to say that to build up a ethical society women empowerment is important.