Length and Quality

I think hair is one of those natural gifts that used to oppress me a lot. Not body or any of the other more obvious things, but hair. I’d see girlies with my type of hair and they’d have it all taken care of with their protective styles and you’d watch it grow longer and longer every month.

I used to be pretty confident with my natural 4B hair, as of 2022 I think. But then I had to face the huge reality check that my hair had stopped growing, if anything, it had receded and I wasn’t sure what to do about the development. I kept contemplating if I should cut the whole hair off and begin my hair journey afresh, but then I thought, even if I did that, what would be my guarantee that it wouldn’t end up the same way?

I suffered and still do from a lot of hair breakages. It got to a point where I could just lightly pull at my hair and just have them fall off like that. Pretty depressing, to say the least. Then combing my hair and seeing like a quarter on the comb. I hit YouTube and kept seeing many natural remedies to curing hair breakage and hair loss but so far, I’ve not found what works. And that’s the case till now. Although my Mom said she’d found a remedy and we could try it out tomorrow, the fact that my hair is not growing they way I’d have liked stresses me out more than I thought it would.

However, emotionally, compared to how much I value hair, I haven’t been that down. Maybe it’s because I believe that it’s something that I can salvage or because I still have confidence in me as a person(without the hair). Either way, I do not let it weigh me down. If one thing doesn’t work, then another will. Hopefully, this one will.

The second question posed by the Ladies of Hive Community is what I’ll be answering next. When it comes to quality conversation, I think it is made harder than it should be. Because quality conversation just has to do with interactions held on a personal level with a person or people of interest.

Concerning quality conversation, the first port of call is a shared interest. Conversations could be so awkward when you have nothing to talk about. Nothing binds you and the person you’re conversing with, whether in career, hobbies, or maybe even principles. A shared interest in something can spark the greatest of conversations because it’s a subject that you both can relate to and so even when you’re not the one currently speaking, your eyes still light up hearing the other speak.

Another thing is open-mindedness. I think being a good listener and keeping an open mind go hand in hand. For the best kind of conversations, you need to learn to listen without subconsciously picking faults, without criticizing or already drawing up your own stories to seem like the cooler person. Listening without condemnation and being attentive builds for a quality conversation. I say this after the first one because if there is no shared interest, if you’re not remotely interested in the person you’re speaking to, you wouldn’t even be able to listen let alone be open minded about what that person is saying.

The last important one I’d like to talk about concerning having a quality conversation is mutual respect. When you respect that person, not just in your mannerisms towards the person but with your words, a conversation can be had. You cannot have a quality conversation if one or both of you keep fiddling with your phones and doing other things that show you’re not interested. You can’t also have a quality conversation if you have a biting or scathing remark for everything that person says.

Respect is needed from you and the person you’re conversing with if quality conversation is to be had. I’ve had a few times this year where I needed to apply all of these with people that I did not expect to have such lovely conversations with. But because I stepped out of trying to have my say and being a know-it-all to genuinely listening, a lot of beautiful things happened in those relationships. Things I cherish till now.

So while we wait for my celebratory story of having my hair restored to its former glory, let’s learn to have respectful, meaningful and quality conversations.

Jhymi🖤

_{Images are mine.}

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