SOMETHING SCARY

Ever since I can remember myself, I've always been someone who loves trying new things. As a child, I secretly wanted to experiment on everything and anything around me. This mentality drew me far from reality as it became hard to reminisce with feelings and emotions of the real world. Imagine stealing not because I needed it, but just to understand how thieves feel. Or was it drinking just to see if what I watched in the movies was real? I think it's one of the reasons why I didn't fret the day robbers attacked my family. Instead, I was laughing in amusement seeing what I watched in movies happening to me in real life.

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Apart from those silly things I grew up tearing the different relationships I was in apart in amusement to see my partner's reaction if I did certain things. I wasn't the loud mischievous child, instead, I was the silent delusional child. It wasn't until I fell in love with one of the persons I was experimenting my adventurous lifestyle on that I began to take life more seriously. Unfortunately by the time I had come to my senses of what it truly means to be human, when my humanity started springing forth, I realized I had lost something I might never get again. It took over 5 years before I could forgive myself and move on.

Now I understand fear as part of human nature, I've also come to understand sympathy and empathy, but then again it doesn't mean my adventurous lifestyle is all gone. Just that my adventures are no longer delusional; like wondering how it would feel if I stabbed myself with a knife. I had once broken my new phone screen trying to understand whether John Cena's signature move “five knuckle choko” was really painful. At a time it was getting out of hand and I would have become a perverted monster, but I'm grateful to God that I found my way back to sanity. If there's anything I would still love to do for adventure, it would be something that would scare the hell out of me.

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I would have said going to try out boxing, but I know the pain will be severe and I don't like to lose 😂. So instead I will go skydiving. I don't know how it's going to be, I've seen a lot of people pass out in the process, and I'm kinda scared of heights even though I don't like to show it, but what's adventure if it ain't scary 😂. I can't even begin to imagine how it will be when I am tossed off thousands of feet over the ground, and move at a very incredible speed for a time… I'm certain it's something I would do if given the opportunity and resources, I don't know when it will be, but I will certainly do it. I think the major difference between me now and then is that I no longer experiment with people, I will prefer to be experimented on instead. Growing a conscience comes naturally for some people, others will need to water it up before It grows.

THIS IS MY RESPONSE TO HIVE LEARNER'S PROMPT FOR WEEK 98 EPISODE 1