I forfeited my money on a risky loan

Helping our friend and colleague out in trying times shouldn't really be a big deal until a situation arises where the person asking for the loan or assistant is someone you're not certain might be able to pay it back. I've been in such shoes on three occasions, and I can tell you for a fact that indulging in a risky loan isn't something we should do, especially when the amount is one we can't easily overlook or let go of.

About a few years ago, a colleague of mine wanted to get married to the love of his life, and despite not having most things in place, including an apartment and a befitting job that could sustain him and his new family, he said he'd carry on with the wedding despite our advice and caution. Unfortunately for him, as the wedding date drew nearer, reality began to dawn on him that he needed a huge amount of money to keep up.

The date of the wedding had been fixed and was just a few weeks away; he hasn't even furnished his newly rented house that was gotten from some money he borrowed on an application, nor has he purchased all the necessary bride prizes requested from his bride family. It's been a trying period for him, and it became evident as he began to grow slimmer, yet he said he can't call off the wedding because he has already gone too far.

To cut a long story short, he approached me and his other friends, requesting that we please loan him some money and stating that he'd pay it back a few months after his wedding. That plead made us sit him down once again, and there to enlighten him that marriage won't be a bed of roses because the little penny he's earning that isn't enough to cater for his singular need won't be able to sustain two souls, but he should get angry and state that if we won't borrow him the money, we should come plain rather than cutting corners.

At the end of the day, in order not to disgrace him since the wedding was days away, we all gathered about 375 thousand naira for him to use in purchasing some of the requirements needed for the wedding to be successful and also stock his house with some furniture and food stuffs. My share of the money given to him was 80 thousand naira, and that was how he got married.

After about a month into his wedding. He can't stop calling me and some of our other friends about how he's broke and how he and his wife have nothing to eat. In a nutshell, he's asking for another support, not necessarily a loan this time around, which we do send according to our capacity. It's such a disheartening experience because sometimes I wonder if I was the one who got married or him based on the amount of times he called to help meet the needs of his wife.

They've been married for over five years, and yet none of us who lent him the money have been able to get back a dime out of our money. I can remember calling him tirelessly during the period when my junior brother was on the hospital bed with the hope that he'd pay me so I could use the money to pay for my brother's surgery, but all I got were excuses and pleas that I should give him more time.

Well, now I've had enough of his complaining, got bored with it, and already let go of the money because, as it stands, he obviously still can't afford to pay me back, so I've left the money and also decided not to help anyone out of pity, especially when I'm not sure if I'll get back my money'.

Thanks so much for your time. That's about all I have to say about my experience giving out a risky loan, which was prompted by the Hive Learners community writing prompt contest. You can check out more information here.

Thanks for your support, have a blessed day ahead.